Van Jones called the arms ban too drastic,  
And the party debate went ballistic.  
“More savvy than Barack?”  
Was his sharp counterattack,  
While Dem unity proved less elastic.

In Saudi caves, cats lay dry and discreet,  
Their DNA made the findings complete.  
Two lineages showed  
Where cheetahs once strode,  
So revival plans may be spot-on and fleet.

There once was a hardhat-clad beaver,
Posting “dam good advice,” a believer:
Save water, toss less plastic,
Back beaver work fantastic—
He really gives a dam, that achiever.

There once was a writer named Heller,
Whose Dog Stars made bleak nights more stellar;
He stocked up on skills,
From tough outdoor drills,
Come Heller high water—best-seller.

There once was a traveler distraught,
At Customs sans passport—got caught;
On Scottish greens, no cart,
With phones showing no bars to start—
“Fore-give me, dear chief; grief’s got me overwrought.”

For the second time this week up North,
two short-range firebolts leapt forth;
With war-games on a diet,
the neighbors don't buy it—
Seoul-searching for missives, not missiles, henceforth.